Super Hero Training

I have terrible news to share with you.

IncrediDad is no more. My new moniker is Daddy Evil . . .

No, I don’t like the sound of that. Let’s try it again.

I am BadDad! ArchNemesis to Boy Wonder.

Why the sudden name change? As you know, IncrediReaders, we started him in daycare and, even though he survived pledge week, he is not a fan.

The tears begin as soon as I pull into the parking lot every morning. He sobs as I punch in the code to the door and all the way down the hall to his cubby. He stops for a second when we hang up his backpack but it starts all over again when I pass him off to the teacher.

I’ve never felt like a bigger bad guy than I do at this point every morning. He digs his nails into my arms, screams, and begs me not to go. What do I do? I give him a kiss and walk out the door. The hardest part is ignoring his cries as I force myself to keep walking out the door. “He’ll be okay.” I repeat over and over again. This emotional ass kicking seems only fair since I continually traumatize my son every morning.

Oh how the mighty have fallen. I’ve gone from playing at the park with Boy Wonder every morning to breaking his heart every day. Like Harvey Dent once said, “You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.”

Wait a second, I wasn’t born a villain. I’m the hero of this blog! And hero’s don’t lose hope. We keep trying. It turns out that I needed help from the heroes of the Golden Age. Not Batman. Not Superman. I’m talking about the Red Hat Ladies of yore. Heroes in their Golden Years. IncrediGram and IncrediGram-In-Law! When their powers combine, it’s amazing what can get accomplished.

IncrediGram-In-Law bought Boy Wonder a new backpack for school. That present did it’s job and then some. From the minute he opened it, Boy Wonder has worn that thing like a utility belt. Some mornings, he wakes up and puts it on right away. He proudly shows it off to anyone who will listen. “Backpack! Backpack!” It’s become a morning routine for us to march it to his cubby and proudly hang it up for everyone to see.

IncrediGram helps us ease Boy Wonder’s torture by picking him up early. He still does a full day, but she gets him around 3:30 instead of me not getting there until 5:00. It’s helped a lot. IncrediGram always comes armed with snacks and a juice box for the ride home. When they get to her house, Boy Wonder is content to chill on the couch and watch his favorite movies after doing hard time in the joint all day.

Who knows where we’d be without the help of these seasoned superheroes. I can’t thank them enough. In fact, they both gave me the same advice; Boy Wonder has been through so much in the past month. He will need some time to adjust. It will probably take him about twenty days to adjust to this new routine. As of today, we are on Day #11. Half-way there. And things are looking better every day. For example, lately, he’s stopped crying as soon as his teacher takes him from me.

This is just a rough patch in his super hero training. Super Hero Training…maybe that’s what we should rename daycare. I bet he’d like it a whole lot more if he was learning how to hone his super powers. What powers you ask? How about the powers of sharing, caring, and crime fighting? Yes, that’s exactly the thing that would motivate my little sidekick!

On second thought, let’s forgo the name change. There’s plenty of time for me to become a villain later on, in his teenage years. For now, I want to be the hero he needs and the one who helps him succeed!

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