The One That Got Away

I’m fond of our bed. Bex would be surprised to hear that because I frequently said otherwise about this pile of mattress and metal when we first started dating. It was a love/hate relationship back then. 

You see, the bed actually belonged to Bex first. She was so proud of it because it was the first big purchase she made after landing her dream job. During our dating days, she moved no less than three times (the last move being into the apartment we live in now). Guess who disassembled, hauled, and reassembled that bed each time? No, it wasn’t the cat. I can’t even get him to clean his own litter box. 

Needless to say, even though it wasn’t mine at first, I feel very attached to that bed now. So why is it that I hardly spend time on it anymore? That’s because almost 11 months ago, Boy Wonder moved in and established his dominance. 

Neither one of us remembers making the decision to try co-sleeping but there he is every morning, taking up half of my bed. Meanwhile, I lay squished to one side with half a cheek hanging off the mattress. And that’s when he’s actually sleeping.

If you didn’t know already, co-sleeping is when you lay down in bed with your kid and listen to him scream all night long. It’s fabulous. At this point, I find myself purposely picking a fight with Bex so she’ll make me sleep on the couch. My legs may hang off of it, but at least it’s mine.  

The bottom line is that our kid just isn’t a sleeper. I could fart and he would be wide awake and on red alert. “Mom, Dad, did you feel the tremor? I felt it. Here comes the big one!”

Here’s the thing, I still want sleep, and I want it in my bed. I’ll be honest, some of my best acting has been done between those sheets. “Sorry honey, I didn’t notice him crawling all over us. You got it under control though? Gnite.”

Everyone has their opinion on babies’ sleep habits and most people gladly share whether we want it or not. Say it with me folks “Opinions are like assholes. . .”

Trust me, us new parents are already getting our fair share of advice. When it comes to the topic of sleep, arguably the most difficult thing for parents and baby, everyone seems to think they know the right way to do it and obviously yours is the wrong way.

IncrediDads, the only “right” way is the one that works for your family. Even if you have a baby who sleeps 10 hours uninterrupted (I’m pretty sure you’re lying), however you choose to sleep, if you have young kids, you are going to be tired. Some kids just don’t sleep and it’s up to you to adjust.

So excuse me if I have a vacant look when you’re talking to me. I’m just sleeping with my eyes open. It’s not that what you have to say isn’t important, I’m just to tired to care.

Nowadays, I look at my bed as the one that got away. She was always there to support me and I took her for granted. We flirt from a distance but never kid ourselves, that relationship was never meant to be.

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