Bex and I had our first date the day before Thanksgiving. Actually it was our first date A.D. (After Delivery). It wouldn’t have happened except that my mom was in town and she offered her services as babysitter. That’s a polite way of saying that she kicked us out so she could spend quality time with her grandson.
After reading my mom the riot act of Luke’s routine, do’s and don’ts, and emergency numbers, it still took me three tries to get out the door. Each time it was the same;
“Hey Mom, don’t expose him to direct sunlight. Make sure you cover him up.”
“Thanks. I’ve got it David.”
I walk out the front door, only to walk back in a few seconds later.
“Hey Mom, don’t wait to long to change his diaper. He doesn’t like being wet.”
I leave again but I’m back a few seconds later.
“Hey Mom, whatever you do, don’t feed him after-“
“Dammit David. He’s a baby not a gremlin!”
Well the Gaygen’s certainly had a wild night ahead of us. The first stop was getting haircuts, something that hadn’t been done in months. I think the part we were looking forward to the most was sitting in the barber chair and doing absolutely nothing for forty-five minutes.
Bex had recently discovered that long hair and a baby with grabby hands weren’t the best combo. So she decided to chop a good eight inches off. Her stylist told her that she had the worst tangles he had ever seen. I’m pretty sure he was about to pull out the weed whacker when she explained everything she had been through in the past month. After that, he put away the lawn tools and gave her the full spa treatment. It must have been exactly what she needed because not only did she look like a supermodel, she had her old pre-pregnancy energy back when she met me in the lobby.
Suddenly, I was a fifteen year old boy again. I was nervously drying off my sweaty palms on my shorts. When I tried to speak, my mouth was dry and I was tongue tied.
There was a little voice in the back of my head checking out the facts. Definitely, still gorgeous and surprisingly, yes, still your wife. I managed to choke out a compliment and offer to take her to dinner and a movie.
She accepted my invitation but there was something we both wanted to do first.
“Baby’s fine. Hasn’t turned into a Gremlin yet.”
“Hi Mom. How’s it going? Did he nap? Is he too much trouble? We can come home now.”
“You know this isn’t my first time doing this, right? I’m just sitting here, reading him Fifty Shades of Grey.”
“It’s not what you read. It’s how you read it.”
“I’m turning the car around.”
“Don’t you dare. Go enjoy your movie. What do you think is gonna happen?”
Well, that was reassuring.
Dinner was quiet. We were eating at one of those make your own pizza restaurants. Pizza is the most fun food ever invented. That’s why you always have it at parties. Pizza and Party, they go hand in hand. Yet, we weren’t doing much partying.
“What are you thinking about?” I asked.
“The baby.” Bex answered.
I was too. Pathetic huh? Our first night alone in a month and all we could think about was our kid.
We started to talk about our hopes, dreams, and aspirations for the lil’ guy. Bex had lofty goals. She told me that she secretly hoped he would become a dancer like her. I tried to stay a little more practical. I told her that I hoped he pooped for Grammie tonight,instead of saving it for us.
I don’t think either one of us enjoyed the movie very much. We were fidgety and bolted out as soon as the credits started to roll.
“Do you think we’ve been gone to long?”
“I hope we haven’t taken advantage of your mom.”
“Do you think he missed us?”
“David, I think we have a problem.”
Bex was right. We definitely had a problem. There was too much traffic and we weren’t getting home fast enough.
When we finally walked through the front door, Luke was snoring and my mom was baking date nut bread. There were no disasters, catastrophes, or gremlins. We hadn’t missed any milestone moments. Everything was exactly as we left it. Mom was right, what did we think was going to happen?
Still, I really did miss him. So, after the girls went to bed, I scooped Luke out of his crib and held him in my arms the rest of the night.